kicking and screaming...

I cannot lie...I really do like to get my way. I think it's something that got started long ago when I was a baby. The sad fact is it just gets worse as we get older. The funny thing is that we find all different ways to justify getting our way based on a variety of excuses. I think that's called rationalization. In other words, it's trying to find a good reason for something we know that is wrong. Over the years my reasons may have changed but the basic fact is that sometimes I, quite childishly, still want my way. It's simple, really...we see something that we want...we go after it. If we are successful then all's right with the world. However, if we are not...this is where the trouble begins. We go through everything in our bag of tricks. If none of the most benign things work then things become complicated. Then we ...sin. Yep...we have gotten so good at getting our way we can even rationalize breaking Gods laws to get our way. Of course, we don't really think of that as being sin, right? Even in the face of logic and overwhelming common sense...in the very presence of God...we still insist that we are right. I have thought a lot about what drives this urge in me and others. I think I've got it...one word...control. If I am always getting my way in everything I do then I am in perfect control and if not...well, we have a problem. This type of control is self defeating and ultimately strangling as we are unable to live apart from control and perfect order. The reality we know is... that world doesn't exist... but that doesn't stop us. The basic flaw in the supposition that I can create this so called perfect world is that I always know what is best for me and everyone else. This creates in us an arrogance and living with such a sense of entitlement that it leaves no room for God to wreck our lives. We become cynical and it is an inconvenience when God intervenes into our carefully planned day. This is why we desperately cling to things that are known and comfortable. We feel safe living out our ordinary life in the confines of a box we create. We, in effect, become prisoners to our prejudices and fears. Anything out of our realm of safety and sameness is scary and threatening to us. To become a disciple of Jesus and to follow Him it can only be one way...His way...the narrow way. To become His disciple there is a cost and a sacrifice that many of us are unwilling to bear. We want it our way most of the time and the way of Jesus a little. Sadly, that is not compatible with the kind of life that Jesus calls us to, as a follower. We want to live a half and half life. Uh...sorry, no good. I think Jesus is very clear here when He says to give up everything and follow. It doesn't mean to follow in a way that reflects that you are getting your way. No, it means to follow in totality and surrender and that is scary for many of us because that life is unpredictable and feels out of control. The actual danger of this type of living is that it adversely affects the development of our faith. Our faith cannot possibly be strengthened if we always get our way and believe it is with our efforts alone that good things happens. That only creates in us self reliance and that is a destroyer of faith. The other danger is that we try to get Jesus to do what we want Him to do in order to get our way. We reshape Jesus to fit our lives. We redefine Jesus to get Him to be compatible with our worldview and consequently diminish the importance of reflecting Him in all we do. I cannot be selfish and always desiring to get my way and attempt to be a witness to others of the transforming power of the gospel. It's called living a lie...being a phony...a hypocrite...or as Jesus said, “Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, hypocrites that you are! You are like whitewashed tombs, which indeed look fair outside, while inside they are filled with dead men’s bones and all kinds of filth. It is the same with you. Outwardly, and to others, you have the look of religious men, but inwardly you are full of hypocrisy and sin.” That's pretty strong. So many times I have heard from those who choose not to follow Christ that the church is phony and full of theses so called posers doing make pretend Christianity. I say... yeah, true...so what? My job or purpose is not to reform my or any other church. My decision to follow Jesus is based on a relationship with Him and to reflect, bring glory, and share His truth with the world in how I live that out. My attitude and actions should be a powerful witness to others....not only when I succeed but when I fail as well. It is no longer important for me to get my way anymore as I develop an understanding of walking with Jesus, being humble and serving others looks like. I become less and less important and I become not so egocentric. A baby is egocentric because as far as they know nothing exists beyond their very selves. A small child who throws themselves down on the floor at Walmart, having a fit, is learning the most primal theory of stimulus and response. If I cry and scream and make a big enough scene...I'll get my way. This actually works almost all the time because we give in and that reinforces the behavior. As we get older we just get more sophisticated and that is called manipulation. Some of us get very good at it...very good. If you have kids you have worked over at some point ...or soon will be. The problem occurs when you are so used to manipulating others, to get your way, you try it with God. I often just sit and imagine that He really gets a big hearty laugh at that one. I think it's a good thing that we can entertain God from time to time. I know that I have probably made Him laugh a lot...and still do...

I am a leper...

"A man with leprosy came to him and begged him on his knees,“If you are willing, you can make me clean.” Jesus was indignant. He reached out his hand and touched the man.“I am willing,” he said. “Be clean!” Immediately the leprosy left him and he was cleansed. Jesus sent him away at once with a strong warning:“See that you don’t tell this to anyone. But go, show yourself to the priest and offer the sacrifices that Moses commanded for your cleansing, as a testimony to them.” Instead he went out and began to talk freely, spreading the news. As a result, Jesus could no longer enter a town openly but stayed outside in lonely places. Yet the people still came to him from everywhere. "

So, recently I have been thinking of the so called untouchables who live on the fringes of our communities in today's time. I'm thinking that not much has changed in regard to our response and treatment of the marginalized and truly least of these. In the time of Jesus, leprosy was a terrible disease to have. It was disfiguring and debilitating both physically and psychologically. People with leprosy, in effect, became their disease and lived lives as victims thinking they were being punished by God. If you had leprosy you were doomed to live in exile away from friends, family, and your church. Everything that could provide you support and encouragement was taken away and you were left alone...literally. However, all that changed one day when one totally audacious leper approached Jesus and dared to ask to be healed. In these five short verses in Mark there is a lot happening there that changes everything in both this lepers life, people in his community and in the healing ministry of Jesus. In different translations of the Bible it tells us what the response of Jesus was to this leper. Some say Jesus was moved with compassion and another says he was moved with pity and sympathy. I like best what the New International Version says...”Jesus was indignant”. I think this word, indignant, may have perfectly well summed up how Jesus may have reacted...”feeling, characterized by, or expressing strong displeasure at something considered unjust, offensive, insulting, or base”. There were many reasons for Jesus to be indignant here aside from essentially being dared to heal this leper. He was indignant at the system that denied this leper and He was indignant at the disease and the evil it represented. However, the point is that Jesus was both indignant and felt compassion at the same time. I think about this in relation to someone suffering with a life threatening disfiguring disease or mired in the grip of extreme poverty. We can certainly be angry at the disease or the situation and yet simultaneously feel extreme compassion for the victim. We can be very angry and also have righteous indignation at the oppressive evil and injustice in the world and because of it be moved with compassion just as Jesus was. So...ok, we've got compassion...great, but now what? Well, now comes the next critical piece...reaching out our hands and... touching. Although, we have read and heard many times of how stunning and radical it was for Jesus to touch this leper, I'm still not sure we get the full impact of what happened there that day. In that one touch...in that instant...the world was turned upside down as one of the strictest laws of the day was shattered. In effect, Jesus and the leper made an exchange...they traded places. I am at a loss to think of anything that Jesus could have done more upsetting, more revolutionary, more reverberating or...more loving. This was the essence of the restoration that comes by being loved by Jesus and touched in the most powerful way possible...receiving grace and redemption and healing both physically and emotionally. Our illnesses that we bear are inextricably linked together...both the physical and the emotional. So many times we pray for healing of a physical ailment or condition but neglect the emotional component. If you have ever suffered from a chronic disease or condition you understand that sometimes your identity becomes that disease. In effect, you become cancer, diabetes, HIV/AIDS, homelessness, poverty, or anything else that robs you of living fully. It becomes your identity and we live our lives as victims. The problem with that, of course, is we never have to accept responsibility for our lives or any decisions affecting them. Jesus was the master of looking beyond the obvious physical infirmities and speaking healing into our souls. Who are those that are like lepers in our communities? What is our own personal and our churches relationship to such people that have been marginalized.? Are there people whom we wouldn't dare touch with the proverbial ten foot pole? Say yes here...because there are. Would Jesus still want to touch them? Do you ever feel like this daring risk taking leper? Or would you rather suffer with your infirmities afraid to ask Jesus to heal your brokenness? Who do we treat like lepers in our communities? Who is shut out and excluded from a loving community? What is our churches response and relationship to such people? I think we know the answer to that one, right? Are there people whom we wouldn't want to touch, even if we could? Have we ever experienced Jesus like this leper? How has Jesus healed and restored us to wholeness? Are we ever the Levitical priests in this story? Are our churches the "them" who need a witness about the power and authority of Jesus? I know...a lot of questions...Answers? Just curious...

calling bluffs and going all in...

Many years ago, while working as a traveling nurse, I lived in Las Vegas. I found it to be one of the most paradoxical places I have ever lived. In the midst of all the glitter and glam and incredible amounts of neon there was much literal and figurative darkness. I can assure you that being a resident there as opposed to being a tourist you have a whole different sensibility. There is abject homelessness and poverty in the face of what appeared to be extreme wealth. It could be quite deceptive though, as a lot of people liked to look like they were living large high rollers if only for a weekend and Vegas caters to that. There's an obvious difference between the “haves” and “have nots” and that drives a lot of crime there. It's a big tease... making one believe the big jackpot will come...eventually. I also loved to watch seemingly normal people come for a visit and and shortly lose their minds there in lots of different ways. It usually didn't take too long...a couple days of gambling...not eating right,,,not sleeping much...and constant sensory overload. I will admit that I frequented a few casinos from time to time and one of the things I really enjoyed was watching people gamble. It truly is one of the most mystifying and fascinating things in the world. I eventually discovered that there were amazing masters of gambling psychology who ran these casinos and we, the foolish and naive gambler, were at their mercy from the time we walked in the front door. If we only knew we never had a chance....well, maybe just a very slim one. Anyway, there was one type of gambler I particularly liked to watch...the amateur poker player. There was a very wide spectrum of amateur poker players...older grandmas and grandpas...college kids...women...girls...men...literally every description imaginable. They each had their own style and idiosyncrasies and quirks. These are what the pros study in detail when sending you away from their tables....humiliated and beaten. People are predictable and that is more that apparent when they get good cards. Let's just say the “poker face” is not a well developed tool with most casual infrequent players. My favorite thing, by far, is when someone goes “all in”. So, all in means you push in the entirety of your chips on the bet that you have what it takes to win the pot. So, I got to thinking about going all in... whether if gambling or just in our daily life. What really prompts this decision? I maintain it boils down to one simple idea...faith. Granted, that faith may be misplaced on a lot of different things. But, in order to act in most everything we do, it requires faith at the core of that decision. I had discovered quite a while back that faith was not passive nor a noun. I can say I have faith but, to me, that sounds nebulous and difficult to measure. Jesus talked a lot about faith and it almost always seemed to be tangible and linked with fear. As difficult as it may be to measure, Jesus was clear when He said, in Matthew 17:20, “He replied, “Because you have so little faith. Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.”

As small as a mustard seed...now THAT'S pretty small. That one fact should be a clue to us how powerful Christian faith actually is. However there is an even more critical element to the power of your faith and that is the action part. This is the place where it changes from noun to verb. It's one thing to believe something but unless tested the faith remains static, passive and does not strengthen and grow. Again, Jesus was very clear on this as well when He said, in James 2:14-17, “What does it profit, my brethren, if someone says he has faith but does not have works? Can faith save him? If a brother or sister is naked and destitute of daily food, and one of you says to them, “Depart in peace, be warmed and filled,” but you do not give them the things which are needed for the body, what does it profit? Thus also faith by itself, if it does not have works, is dead.

So, back to our gambler...He may believe that he has the best possible chance to win...he may have (mis)placed faith in his cards, fate or whatever...but, unless he commits the physical act of pushing the chips in...nothing happens. Unfortunately, a lot of gamblers like many Christians like to hedge their bets...meaning hold a little back. What does that mean? Essentially lack of total faith. We live this way a lot because we let fear stand in the way of living a radical all in life. In a much earlier blog I wrote about when Jesus called John and James away from their nets and their family fishing business. What I wrote was,“ Jesus wasn't just talking about fishing nets here. What was shown to me is Jesus was speaking here in a figurative sense as He often did. He was telling Peter and Andrew, and all of us, to drop their "safety" nets not necessarily just their fishing nets. What is a safety net ? It is that thing that catches us when we fall.” We find comfort and security in our various nets. So, the dropping of those nets is the faith piece but is incomplete until we step out and follow. Sadly, many of us are hesitant...clutching desperately our pile of chips...afraid...tentative...weighing the consequences of a misstep...wondering if our safety net will catch us. We want to live in a one foot in and one foot out kind of way. I love the excitement that is generated at a poker table when someone, with a big pile of chips, decides to go all in. I remember sometimes watching...holding my breath...praying. Silly, huh? But, really...what if we could just let go for one time...go all in...push away the pile of everything we thought so important...and let Jesus catch us?  What if...

insufficiency...

I went to see a friend today...at a funeral home. Suddenly, tragically and unexpectedly someone I knew was gone. In a blink of an eye...things changed for her husband...her son...her family...and many who knew her. I really do dislike immensely going to see people at funeral homes...I can say with complete certainty that every one that I have gone to has been surreal. I guess I would say it started with looking at my father lying in repose, in his dress Army uniform, when I was thirteen. It really was an occasion that birthed more questions than answers and that hasn't changed. That's funny...I just realized I wrote...questions were “birthed” at a death. See what I mean? How weird is that? But, it's true. I have as many questions now as I did then except I know a lot more of the standard pat answers we give to thirteen year old boys. Oddly enough, that is the age of her son. What can I say to him that makes any sense? Nothing...nada...zero...zilch...absolutely nothing. There is no sense to be made out of a thirteen year old losing a mom or a dad, right? There comes a big tear in the fabric of our lives that has been woven over time. Some have described it as a “hole in their heart” or in many other descriptive but insufficient ways. Everything will change...everything will be different...everything you know about the world changes. This is going to hurt...a lot. You will lose some innocence...I am touched by the biting sting of death of a loved one and I have a sour taste in my mouth. Everything you are or hope to be will have the faint taste of this loss on it. How do you explain that to a thirteen year old boy? Nobody even tried to for me...I kind of wish they had...

heck yeah I'm hungry...

So, here I am on day 22 of a fast and I really am feeling ok even though some think I am completely insane. Al I can say in my defense is...that's ok. This is something I do...I believe in...I understand...and really, it's ok. I found this piece I wrote two years ago, about this same time along, during a similar fast. I think it's worth reposting now as I pretty much feel the same and perhaps you will understand...why it's ok.

I am thinking about hunger again. I know that seems to be a frequently visited topic in my blog posts, but… It really is something we need to think about more. I am not only thinking about physical hunger but I am specifically thinking about the deep hunger for God. Jesus spoke quite often about the hungry and hunger. In Luke 4:1-2 it says, “ Then Jesus, being filled with the Holy Spirit, returned from the Jordan and was led by the Spirit into the wilderness, being tempted for forty days by the devil, And in those days He ate nothing, and afterwards, when they had ended, He was hungry.” And Satan being the ever clever liar was aware of that hunger and tried to get Jesus to turn a stone into bread. Imagine how hungry Jesus must have been after forty days? Some of us can barely last four hours. The devil knows that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach especially when really hungry. This was also apparent even in Old Testament days as Esau sold his birthright to his brother Jacob for some lentil stew. That was an expensive meal. However there is a tool that is available and often used to call our appetite into submission. It is a fast. Now I am not going into all the details and the whys and wherefores of fasting here. There are plenty of books written if you need to do a scholarly investigation on fasting. I will simply say it is a very powerful weapon when teamed with prayer to tap into the power of God to speak into your life. The enemy, Satan, wants you distracted and hungry for food and things of the world. When you fast and pray you focus sometimes very intensely on desiring what God wants and waiting to hear what that is. There is a long and extensive history of fasting in the bible and some amazing things have happened secondary to fasting and praying. Moses fasted and so did Jonah, Daniel, David and Elijah among others. Fasting takes you away from the world; it is a renewal of your spirit and a powerful form of worship. Fasting gives me an opportunity to change my diet. It is amazing when I am not attentive to what I eat that I gain weight and am still hungry. I am overfed as many of us are but lacking something in my diet. Fasting helps me to focus on Jesus, the one who can satisfy real hunger. The temporary hunger I feel is just that…temporary. It has to constantly be satisfied in a variety of ways. We struggle to appease this never filled feeling that affects everything in our lives, our jobs, our relationships and our sense of self worth. We become enmeshed in a tangled mess of lies and deception and live lives in the desperation of having to consume stuff to mollify our hunger. I have decided to tackle this issue and look at my own personal hunger. For all of us it is different. For many of us it is uncomfortable. It is not easy to face something which we hate to admit controls us and drives our every decision. But there is a reward to be had in doing this. In the bible in 2 Chronicles 7:14, it says, “ if My people who are called by My name will humble themselves, and pray and seek My face, and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and forgive their sin and heal their land.” Can you deny that we all need to repent and receive forgiveness? Can you deny the blatant truth that this land needs healing now more than ever before? Our hunger for the wrong things in this world has almost pushed us over the edge and for many it already has. It’s time. It really is time to stop the madness that pushes us to run in circles and never find peace. There is only one way. I think that it is clear what that way is. So, the question then becomes which you will choose. Are you hungry?? What will feed you this year? Or maybe we should ask…who will we feed??

Human trafficking...the Apocalypse...now

Every two minutes, while I am sitting here writing these words, a child is sold into sex slavery. Does that shock you ? Maybe not...But, here's the reality of this tragedy...it isn't stopping and by some estimates is worsening. If you just read the many reports and see the staggering numbers being tossed out it can be so overwhelming as to cause paralysis. One may think...there are so many...everywhere...what can I possibly do. I am reminded of the quote by Robert Kennedy:
“Few are willing to brave the disapproval of their fellows, the censure of the colleagues, the wrath of their society. Moral courage is a rarer commodity than bravery in battle or great intelligence. Yet it is the one essential, vital quality for those who seek to change a world that yields most painfully to change. Each time a person stands up for an idea, or acts to improve the lot of others, or strikes out against injustice, he sends forth a tiny ripple of hope, and crossing each other from a million different centers of energy and daring, those ripples build a current that can sweep down the mightiest walls of oppression and resistance.”
The US State Department has estimated that between fifty to one hundred thousand women and children are being trafficked for the specific purpose of sex slavery. In addition there are more than twenty five thousand brought into the country from many other international locations for the same purpose. Granted the numbers are always in flux but each organization defends their number. For example, in 2001, the FBI estimated 700,000 women and children were trafficked worldwide, UNICEF estimated 1.75 million, and the International Organization on Migration (IOM) merely 400,000. In 2001, the UN drastically changed its own estimate of trafficked people in 2000 -- from 4,000,000 to 1,000,000. As many as 7,000 Nepali girls as young as 9 are sold annually into India's red-light districts, 200,000 in the last decade. Afghani women are sold into prostitution in Pakistan for around 600 rupees - less than $4 a pound, depending on their weight. About 50,000 Asian, Latin American and Eastern European women and children are trafficked into the United States for sexual exploitation, the going rate between $12,000 and $18,000 each.
No matter how debatable...these numbers...no matter how many...have faces. The sad fact is that we look at these numbers and still are not moved into compassionate action to support the rescue of these victims. Where is our righteous indignation? That same kind of anger and action shown when Jesus cleaned house... in His house, so to speak. Our anger wells up in us for a minute or maybe more when we read these endless stories of children being trafficked for sex and then we are on to the next thing. Where is that passion and anger at (barely) speakable sins and incredible injustice that makes us want to turn over some tables of our own? Just sitting here thinking about a twelve year old girl having to have sex with ten to twelve grown men a day makes my blood pressure go up and sickens my stomach. But it certainly will take more than that to move many of us into action. As with most social justice issues like poverty, homelessness, hunger, addictions and lack of access to education and medical care, it will not seem real until it's personal and up close. Unless these issues directly affect you or someone in your family...you have no clue. You are only guessing what it must be like at fourteen or fifteen years old to be beat daily by a pimp you call “daddy”. Or selling your daughter for a paltry sum to support an addiction...I mean really, just how bad does it have to get? I am sure there some who are on the front lines of this fight that could tell many stories...well...maybe not...maybe they can't get the words out anymore...Our tolerance for what we will accept for these children is way beyond what it should be. The things we condone by our apathy become, in effect, the things we agree to. What is right and moral and worth turning tables over for becomes hazier and less important the farther away we get from it. Even though there is a lot of talk and advocacy going on with this issue the action part seems to be very lacking. Last year, I discovered the term is called “slactivism.” As per WIKIPEDIA...”The word is usually considered a pejorative term that describes "feel-good" measures, in support of an issue or social cause, that have little or no practical effect other than to make the person doing it feel satisfaction. The acts tend to require minimal personal effort from the slacktivist.” I can assure that there will be some benefit but things as evil as child sex trafficking will not diminish by wearing a ribbon, a bumper sticker, or a rubber arm bracelet. No...there's gonna have to be more...there simply has to be courageous, determined and sustained action. But to do the action part we have to move in close and get our hands dirty and that's where we fall short.. What an entirely different kind of  ministry Jesus would have had if He was fearful of going into the dark and risky places and picking and choosing who would be the recipient of His grace that day. Can you just imagine for a minute how different peoples lives might have been. Can you imagine a wretched world without the glimmer of hope Jesus brings?We are called by Jesus to fully wade in and He empowers us with divine passion and the power of the Holy Spirit to go beyond what we might have thought possible to correct injustice. It's going to take a risky radical faith... a belief in the omnipotent God who is calling us to come out of the safe place where we live into the life where the previously thought impossible thing becomes normal. Without risk there is no faith...without faith there is no hope...without hope there is only death....faith is a verb.

waiting & warming the bench...redux

It always seems like there seasons in our lives when we are waiting...waiting to hear from God...waiting for the next adventure...waiting to write the next chapter of our story. Waiting is really hard for me. I feel fidgety and tense and have to resist this real desire to help God along on whatever He has planned next for my life. I thought I would repost a blog from a few years ago, written during a season of waiting. I'll just call this one a “Waiting and warming the bench...redux.”
So, I’m sitting on the bench …waiting…to be put into the game. I have trained hard for this moment and I feel especially confident that God will use me. I have “suited up”, I’ve studied the opponent, have learned the plays….C’mon God…put me in the game. Can’t you see I’m dying here? I can help “our side” win. Seriously, God, I’m ready…this is the big game…this is the one I’ve been waiting for. This pretty much sums up how I feel a lot of the time. I am waiting for the next big thing, that big opportunity to show God what I can do for Him. Sadly though, I am going through the agonizing process of learning this is not what God wants from me. As famed writer, Herni Nouwen says, “Waiting is not a very popular attitude. In fact, most people consider waiting a waste of time. Perhaps this is because the culture in which we live is basically saying, “Get going! Do something! Show you are able to make a difference! Don’t just sit there and wait!” For many people, waiting is an awful desert between where they are and where they want to go. And people do not like such a place. They want to get out of it by doing something. In our particular historical situation, waiting is even more difficult because we are so fearful. One of the most pervasive emotions in the atmosphere around us is fear. People are afraid—afraid of inner feelings, afraid of other people, and also afraid of the future. And fearful people have a hard time waiting”. I particularly do not like the waiting part and many times I do, in fact, feel like I am in that awful place between where I am and where I want to go. And for me my natural inclination is to help God along in “putting me into the game” by busying myself with trying to show God how ready I am. WRONG. Not what God wants at all. He made that clear in Luke 10:38-42, when it says, “As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord's feet listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, "Lord, don't you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!" "Martha, Martha," the Lord answered, "you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her." Ah, it’s the age old dilemma…doing versus just being. I so long for God to use me and place me in situations where I can serve Him in extraordinary ways. I have always wanted God to use me to reach out to touch the lives of other people, to be of service for Him and for others in unimaginable ways , to be a useful and valued part of the Body of Christ. I am so busy looking for the big things I realize I quite often miss the small things. I have agonized and wrung my hands needlessly wondering why God just won’t use me for this thing or that. The truth hit me full on and it was that there is a significant difference between God’s desires and mine. Whoops… So, let’s see…God’s desires…not mine, be still and don’t busy myself with things of little importance… Hmmm and finally wait on God and don’t be fearful. WOW. I think these are challenges for all of us as these are the pressures that bear so heavily upon us in our daily lives. A daily prayer for us all is Psalms 46:10, “Be still and know that I am God…”. In that stillness we are reminded of the ever present voice speaking as it always has and always will. There is no need to fear the wait because this is what God wants and He tells us “blessed is he that waiteth”. So, I wait and I am learning that that’s ok.

rearranging furniture...

My wife has this thing that she loves to do about this time of the year...rearrange the furniture in the living room. I am not sure what exactly triggers in her this ancient primal need but I think it is either the incredibly frigid weather outside or the ceremonial taking down of the Christmas tree. Whatever it is I have come to recognize the look she gets in her eye as she scans around the room and then looks out the window...pensive... as if looking at a complex math problem in her head. “You know, it's good to rearrange things things from time to time” she says, still gazing out of the window. That's my cue...to get up and start “picking up” as she calls it. Once things are picked up to her satisfaction, she smiles a smile that I also have come to recognize. satisfaction...the plan is complete and pictured in her mind. The physical rearrangement commences...the vacuum comes out...the cat runs...and in a matter of minutes her vision has been executed with surgical precision. There comes that smile again...satisfaction. It's a good thing to rearrange some things in our lives sometimes...and not just our living room furniture. One of the huge benefits is that it gives us a different view than we have had for a while. It is so easy for things to get comfortable and predictable. Sometimes they are so predictable and in place in my house that I feel, if immediately struck blind...I could navigate pretty well. That's called familiarity. However, it can be a very dangerous thing as we can be easily lulled to sleep in our safety and comfort. I really like to rearrange things as well but in ways more challenging than where will I sit to watch TV. I sometimes equate comfort with routine and doing what is easy and not too risky. It is easy to get into a so called rut and get stuck and believe that things can only be arranged one way...whether furniture, our day, or what is important. I have discovered a great way to discover what things mean...give them up for a while. I have found that intentionally going without something is self revealing about both myself and what that thing represents in my life. For example, for the last few years, we have given up TV and “unplugged” from social media and most internet usage for the month of January. I suppose you could call it a fast, of sorts. It is utterly amazing the transformation that occurs in us when this happens. We talk “to” and not “at” each other...we read a few very interesting books...we listen...really listen...to some thought provoking music... and most importantly we pray, focus and hear Gods voice speaking very loud. Yeah, I know what you are saying about now...Gods voice ? Yeah, that's what I said...Gods voice...plain and clear. Deep inside the depths of our souls...away from the distractions of our daily lives...God is always speaking. The other thing that is so noticeable during this time of quiet is that we consume so much less of everything. We directly attribute that to the incessant barrage of mind control marketing we are not subject to on TV. Again, we become numb and hypnotized by TV and are fair game for every clever marketing campaign tells us what is sexy and desirable. A thing becomes only desirable to the degree of desire it creates within us. However, it is a false and short-lived desire as we want even more the new and improved version of the next best thing. I do not want that type of desire to be programmed into my mind as it is endless and agonizing to “keep up”. I have a different kind of desire and that creates conflict and I have learned, from a good friend, that conflict is a vital part of the story we are writing with our lives. This pseudo-desire for material things burns up in a flash like putting a piece of well seasoned pine wood on a hot fire. It makes a big fire...gives some heat(satisfaction)...but doesn't last. I really want to live in genuine desire of God and the things that are of God. I want to be in constant communion with Him and when there is an abundance of extraneous noise or other distractions present it is difficult. Listening isn't always easy...especially for me. My mind tends to be VERY busy most of the time. However...I want to listen more and pay attention to that voice that speaks to me in a very profound way...or often times speaks through other people...I want to learn to listen to them also. I want to understand the process more of how and why He chooses to speak to me. I know that is done by spending time in prayer, studying the Bible and quietly contemplating what is being spoken in that moment. I know that the more time that is spent in intimacy with God and His words, the easier is will be to recognize His speaking. Why is that so hard ?...I don't know, really. I do know that I am working on it very much during this “quiet time” in January and I am listening...close...right now.

Act Justly, Love Mercy, Walk Humbly...

What does Jesus say to those who possess abundance and wealth in the midst of indescribable poverty? He says a lot...but the bigger question for us to explore is do we hear and, most importantly, act on what He says? I think you would perhaps agree that we frequently fall very short of true sacrificial giving to the poor and those in need. Sadly, a lot of us give in a conscience assuaging and fairly token way, for the most part. It is interesting to note that according to Micah's prophecy the people of Israel and Judah were searching for what it is that God wants of them. Micah quotes them as saying: (Micah 6:6-7) With what shall I come before the LORD and bow down before the exalted God? Shall I come before him with burnt offerings, with calves a year old? (7) Will the LORD be pleased with thousands of rams, with ten thousand rivers of oil? Shall I offer my firstborn for my transgression, the fruit of my body for the sin of my soul?

We, unfortunately, think we know what Jesus requires of us and offer... a canned religious response, a “I go to church” response, a predictable “raise your hands” in worship response. The worshipers of Micah's day were quite prepared to give whatever they believed was required; they were willing to bring any and every sacrifice that the Lord requested; if the Lord demands it they, like Abraham, were even willing to sacrifice their own children. In today's language, we think all we have to do is go to church and that is sufficient. The reality is that there is a huge difference between “going” to church and “being” the church. Yes...absolutely, the Lord does want praise and worship from us. He does love our gifts and offerings given in the right context. BUT... He wants much more than a “just enough” response. Micah tells us God's requirements extend to all of the entirety of the week and not just to what happens in the church on Sundays. (Micah 6:8) He has showed you, O man, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.
In the first place, God requires us to act justly. What does this mean and what does this look like for us? Today, January 11, is National Human Trafficking Awareness Day. We can say one way to act justly means to accept responsibility for the well-being of those suffering oppression as result of being trafficked or enslaved in any manner under other forms of modern day slavery: widows, orphans, disabled, poor, elderly, homeless, and others. These weaker, fragile most vulnerable and disenfranchised members of society are to be found not just here where we live, but also in Asia, Mexico, the Ukraine, Haiti, Africa, Dominican Republic and throughout the entirety of the world. To act justly means to accept responsibility for the well-being of a hungry mother and her children in the Sudan, a child in bondage held for the express purpose of sex, an underpaid sugarcane worker in the Dominican Republic, a dispossessed farmer in Africa, a pensioned widow in inner-city Chicago, and a welfare mom or single mother anywhere in America. To act justly means to accept responsibility for the well-being of the one billion people who are chronically malnourished and who go to bed most nights with empty stomachs. As Gary Haugen, President of International Justice Mission, often says, “ The good news about injustice is...God is against it.” God's Old Testament people very much needed to hear from Micah the demand to act justly in their time just as much as we do today. They needed to hear this because their day-to-day life was marked by a shocking lack of care and concern for the poor, the widow, the orphan, and the alien. In fact, they oppressed the poor and often made life more difficult for them. I find it so utterly amazing the similarities between the days of Micah and our present time. We need not look hard or far to see that we have become selfish, self centered and self serving. Despite all the talk to the contrary we still are about words and not so much in the way of deeds. It's haunting to listen to Micah's words of condemnation: (Micah 2:2) They covet fields and seize them, and houses, and take them. They defraud a man of his home, a fellowman of his inheritance How could one not be reminded of the current foreclosure mess and abundant illegal land seizures going around the world, particularly in third world nations. In another place Micah accuses them of using dishonest scales, weights, and measures in order to get for themselves ill-gotten treasures at the expense of the poor (Micah 6:10,11; Micah 3:1-3).
We are being commanded to be more like Jesus here. Over and over again Scripture tells us about God's concern for the weak,helpless and poor. Deuteronomy 10:18, for instance: "He defends the cause of the fatherless and the widow, and loves the alien, giving him food and clothing." Or the prophet Isaiah: (Isa 1:17) ... learn to do right! Seek justice, encourage the oppressed. Defend the cause of the fatherless, plead the case of the widow. (Is 10:1,2; Psalm 103:6; Amos 5:11,15). There are literally hundreds of passages of scripture that clearly demonstrate that the priority of serving the least is foremost on the mind of Jesus. The Gospels present to us a picture of Jesus... who has tremendous compassion on the frequently assembled crowds, who desires that the little children to come to Him, who is concerned about the plight and welfare of widows and orphans, who continuously heals the sick, who has mercy and bestows healing grace on lepers, who cares for prostitutes who have given up on themselves in their despair, who can promise forgiveness and salvation to every prisoner whether shackled mentally or physically. He was angry about any and every injustice and treated all people equally. Today when there is such overwhelming hunger and seemingly limitless poverty, today when we are to be counted among the world's most wealthy, we are to be like Jesus and mirror His acts of justice in every way possible. God also requires that we love mercy. Because to love mercy is to be filled with an intense longing to help others, to do kind and compassionate deeds for those who are in need. We have been given divine power from Jesus and that with our compassion is all we need to accomplish His work on the earth. Here too we are to imitate God. God, you see, is merciful and full of loving kindness. How can we who have so much abundance in an age of hunger show mercy and bestow grace? We can show compassionate treatment of those in distress and with even the most minor needs. We are the bearers of Christ's grace and we are to dispense it liberally upon others and in doing so we show mercy. There is a very powerful thing that happens when we come along side of someone in this way. This is the same type of compassion Jesus showed to all without respect to the nuances of the situation. In this grace comes love and this brings redemption and restoration. This is the thing that we all desire...to be redeemed and restored into a loving relationship with our Father. This is the primary task we are called to in all that we do. Finally, what does the Lord require of you but "to walk humbly with your God." This is the most important of the three requirements. In fact, unless you walk humbly with your God you cannot act justly or love mercy. It truly is an impossibility... What does it mean to walk humbly with God? It means to live with humility and gratitude. It is the quality of being respectful of others and seeing the “Jesus” in people in our interactions with them. Humility is totally the opposite of how most of us live. We are caught up in a world of arrogance, vanity, aggressiveness and boastfulness of what we have done on our own. Clearly, the challenge is to make Him the center of your life in everything you do and everywhere you go. It means to live a life of fellowship with God...constantly. It means to give your heart to Jesus...wholly and completely and to be thankful for what you have received. The Jesus who gave His life for you deserves nothing less. It means to be filled with the Holy Spirit and the power of Christ so that you are born again and are a new Creation in Christ. It means to spend time with God in prayer and Bible reading. Jesus has called us to a life of discipleship just as He called out His original disciples. I want to live this life and I try really hard to be mindful of the fact that nothing else really matters. It's just so easy to be distracted ...sometimes.